Flourish as a Woman! Can You Tame Your Tongue?
King David prayed:
“Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips” Psalm 141:3
Have you ever prayed a version of King David’s prayer? At some point in our lives, I suspect most of us have found ourselves thinking, “Yikes, I didn’t mean to say that. What possessed me?” I know I have. Here’s an example. Maybe you identify?
I brooded. I fumed. I prayed. I cried. Finally, steamed up and ready to blow, I sat down at my computer.
Hammering out my deeply felt opinions, my wisdom from years of living, and a bunch of sock-it-to-you Scriptures for good measure, I shot my smoldering email into outer space. With the mere press of the “Send” button, my missile headed with cyber accuracy straight to its intended target.
Now, I know myself. I know that when I get really steamed up about something I need to breathe deeply, pray calmly, and not do something foolish. If I don’t, my mood gets grim. My mind gets clouded. My mouth gets going. I do things I know I will regret!
Relief from firing off my email didn’t last long. The recipient, one of my children whose choices I didn’t agree with, shot back a short, sharp, response. Clearly, my motherly input was not appreciated.
I was shocked. After all, don’t we mothers mean well when we occasionally lob our pent-up views at family members? But, as I discovered in no uncertain terms, meaning well and making smart choices aren’t synonymous.
Once again, I had barreled through those pesky mother/adult-child boundaries with my poorly thought-out comments. Instead of building up our relationship, which was my fervent desire, I blew it up!
So much for taming my tongue and speaking wisely! But that’s what I want.
I brooded. I fumed. I prayed. I cried. Finally, steamed up and ready to blow, I sat down at my computer.
Hammering out my deeply felt opinions, my wisdom from years of living, and a bunch of sock-it-to-you Scriptures for good measure, I shot my smoldering email into outer space. With the mere press of the “Send” button, my missile headed with cyber accuracy straight to its intended target.
Now, I know myself. I know that when I get really steamed up about something I need to breathe deeply, pray calmly, and not do something foolish. If I don’t, my mood gets grim. My mind gets clouded. My mouth gets going. I do things I know I will regret!
Relief from firing off my email didn’t last long. The recipient, one of my children whose choices I didn’t agree with, shot back a short, sharp, response. Clearly, my motherly input was not appreciated.
I was shocked. After all, don’t we mothers mean well when we occasionally lob our pent-up views at family members? But, as I discovered in no uncertain terms, meaning well and making smart choices aren’t synonymous.
Once again, I had barreled through those pesky mother/adult-child boundaries with my poorly thought-out comments. Instead of building up our relationship, which was my fervent desire, I blew it up!
So much for taming my tongue and speaking wisely! But that’s what I want.
- I want to learn and grow from the dumb decisions I make that too often end up hurting others—and me!
- I want to be wise spiritually and emotionally, so I recognize what I’m thinking and how I’m feeling before I say or do something I regret.
- Most of all, despite my flaws and foul-ups, I long to become a woman who speaks words that help, heal, and give hope—not a woman who hurls hurtful words without considering their impact.
What does Scripture say about the power of the tongue? Here are truths we all need to remember:
Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath
Proverbs 12:18 Reckless words pierce like a sword but the tongue of the wise brings healing
Matthew 12:34 For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks
Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth
Colossians 3:8 Rid yourselves of all such things as these: rage, malice, slander, filthy language
James 1:19 Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to become angry
I am always so grateful to know that even though we fail to control our tongues at times, God doesn’t abandon us. He doesn’t condemn or punish you or me because we make dumb decisions, or mess up, or act in ways that make us cringe at the thought of anyone finding out.
Instead, like the father of the prodigal son, He stands with His arms outstretched ready to not only receive and forgive us, but also to give us the self-control we all need to speak wisely! Let me encourage you to practice A.B.C.D:
Blessings,
Poppy
I’m currently teaching twice weekly on “Speaking Wisely” using my Fisherman Guide Bible Study as our text. Because this topic is so relevant to all of us, I hope to share some of the main points with you in upcoming blogs. Some of the topics we will look at are Self-talk, Anger, Gossip, Speaking words of love in the family, etc.
Instead, like the father of the prodigal son, He stands with His arms outstretched ready to not only receive and forgive us, but also to give us the self-control we all need to speak wisely! Let me encourage you to practice A.B.C.D:
- Ask God to help you be aware when you’re about to blow!
- Believe the Holy Spirit can help you control your words
- Choose to zip your lips and not say what would be hurtful or divisive
- Determine to leave the situation until you are calm--go and pray!
Blessings,
Poppy
I’m currently teaching twice weekly on “Speaking Wisely” using my Fisherman Guide Bible Study as our text. Because this topic is so relevant to all of us, I hope to share some of the main points with you in upcoming blogs. Some of the topics we will look at are Self-talk, Anger, Gossip, Speaking words of love in the family, etc.
