Don't Say It!

“...A person of understanding holds their tongue.” Proverbs 11:12

I brooded. I fumed. I prayed. I cried. Finally, steamed up and ready to blow, I sat down at my computer.Hammering out my deeply felt opinions, my wisdom from years of living, and a bunch of sock-it-to-you Scriptures for good measure, I shot my highly sensitive email into outer space. With the mere press of the “Send” button, my missile headed with cyber accuracy straight to its intended target.Now, I know myself. I know that when I get really steamed up about something I need to breathe deeply, pray calmly, and not do something foolish. If I don’t, my mood gets grim. My mind gets clouded. My mouth gets going. I do things I know I will regret!Relief from firing off my email didn’t last long. The recipient, one of my children whose choices I didn’t agree with, shot back a short, sharp response. Clearly, my motherly input was not appreciated.I was shocked. After all, we mothers mean well when we occasionally lob our pent-up views at family members. But, as I discovered in no uncertain terms, meaning well and making smart choices aren’t synonymous. Once again, I had barreled through those pesky mother/adult child boundaries with my poorly thought-out comments. Instead of building up our relationship, which was my fervent desire, I blew it up!So much for being a savvy woman who always makes smart choices.But that’s what I want. I want to learn and grow from the dumb decisions I make that too often end up hurting me and others. I want to wise-up spiritually and emotionally so I recognize what I’m thinking, and how I’m feeling, before I say or do something I regret. Most of all, in spite of my flaws and foul-ups, I long to become a savvy woman who makes choices that please God and take me in the direction He wants for my life.How about you? Do you make choices from time to time that are less than smart? I’m asking God to help me use the following check-list so I become a wiser woman:

• Hold it. Choose not to say it.
• Think about the words you want to say. Are they inflammatory or healing?
• Consider your tone. What message does it give?
• Weigh the consequences. Will it produce anger, hurt, shutting down? Is your momentary emotional relief worth the likely result?

Question: If you have tongue problems, what helps you choose not to say it?

Blessings,Poppy SmithInternational speaker, multi-published author, Bible teacher, and spiritual coachInspiring Women to Thrive! Permission to use this article is granted provided the following credit is fully included.Poppy Smith is funny, warm, and passionate about helping women grow spiritually and personally so they experience the love and power of Christ in life’s ups and downs. A former teaching leader with Bible Study Fellowship, Poppy has a Masters in Spiritual Formation and ministers extensively as a retreat and conference speaker both in the US and around the world. For more information about Poppy’s heart, her books and ministry, please visit her website at www.poppysmith.com.